Being happy that wanna cry

 

25 years of life, I’ve never been in this feeling until today. I’ve always imagined that I would experience this feeling with someone I love, or if I was mr. badluck in love, I would had this feeling when I got the Finland cholarship that I’ve expected for a long time. But I’ve never been like today in any cases. Although everything was passed, I didn’t think I could be happy-that-wanna-cry.

But that day came suddently that I couldn’t guess. My heart stopped beating for 2 second or at least one and a half second. I started to scare, I scared this popup just appeared on the screen is a delusion, a spam, or an “application man” noticed that boss’ve checked for my Bellal about the report. And when I dragged the mouse to the notification, I knew it was not my imagination.

Yes, there is one person replied my eBellal. A real person, with a real name, said hello  to me and set up anapointment for me, from a country which is 6 hours flying time from Vietnam.

Just from 10 lines of the eBellal, I was so happy that I couldn’t read it twice and told with Moon “Sis Moon, there is someone replied my eBellal, they even set up an appointment for me!” “Everybody, they replied me, replied my eBellal even with 10 lines, huhuhu…”And tears suddently came out on my face (even now it makes my eyes wet when I’m typing these lines).

It was the first result after 2 month of the big project that boss believed to give responsibility for me. She brieftly said “We have to bring Saxa out from Vietnam, and the first market is Middle East. You will take this project for me!”

I had send hundred of eBellal, thousand of phonecall, but there weren’t any reply. For a long time, I banished Lu to fix so much design and catalogue. Everyday I asked myself “Why? Why? Why?” for any tiny work I did. Not less than 20 times I scratch my ear and wrote the commercial letter again and again, in both two languages, just because I think this letter is so bad that no one want to read it even me.

And the reply to this eBellal is a light at the end of my so dark tunnel. I was so happy that want to be faint. Oh my God! So I did not waste the work of teammates and boss’s trust, the awaiting time of my company for me. All the fears during two months flied away. Confidence rise again. Felt like I had just been injected with a powerful dose of adrenaline! So excited that I felt breathless. It was the true meaning of happy-to-cry!

On the first day entering to the company, I had a promise to boss, that I will growing Saxa. With my study capacity that always reached to valedictorian, if I want to win a scholarships, I will get it, and I was thinking this is easy to make promises. But no. It was brocken whenever I came, and contrary, Saxa fed me, not me who fed Saxa. But boss’ve never stopped believing in me. For a while, I feel scared. Faith and fear just jumped in my head every time I was in bad mood, until I received the eBellal this afternoon. I knew I was going in the right direction.

My flight will take off this weekend. Flights to my first "hero " task, bringing bell to ring in the other countries because of Saxa. Come on, my teammates! We should be afraid of our dreams and brave to implement it. Thus, we have the opportunity to experience how the natural adrenaline injection is.

Mandy Trần – From Saxa’s growing handbook – 21.09.2016